23 Sep Would your child recognise the early signs of online grooming?
Online grooming does not always begin with an obviously inappropriate message. New Australian research suggests some approaches can look surprisingly ordinary at first — making it important for children to know what to watch for and what to do if something feels wrong.
A recent Adelaide University study of around 300 Australian children aged 10 to 17 found many had received online messages that researchers classified as potentially grooming-related. These included strangers asking personal questions, trying to build trust or finding out how closely a child’s online activity was being monitored.
The study was designed as a snapshot of children’s experiences, rather than a nationally representative estimate, so its findings should not be taken to mean that most Australian children are being groomed online.
However, researchers say it highlights how difficult the early stages of grooming can sometimes be to recognise.
It may start with an ordinary conversation
Lead researcher Dr Katie Logos says the most common experiences involved trust-building, personal questions and attempts to find out more about a child’s life and online habits.
“Many interactions can seem friendly or harmless at first,” she says.
Someone may ask what school a child goes to, whether their parents check their phone, or suggest moving a conversation to another app or platform.
Other messages might include “We have so much in common” or “You’re really easy to talk to”.
On their own, these kinds of comments do not necessarily mean someone is grooming a child. The concern is when they form part of a pattern designed to build trust, gather personal information, avoid detection or gradually introduce inappropriate content.
More obvious requests are less common
More explicit approaches were less common in the study, although still significant.
Around one in five children surveyed reported being asked by someone they knew only online to send photos or videos of themselves or to meet in person.
Children also did not always know who they were speaking to. Some believed the other person was another child, although online identities can be difficult to verify.
“This suggests some grooming behaviours may blend into ordinary online conversations and might be difficult to recognise,” Dr Logos says.
What can parents do?
Rather than frightening children about everyone they meet online, parents can help them recognise behaviours that should make them stop and think.
Talk about why it is important to be cautious if someone they do not know offline:
- asks for personal information such as their school, address or routines
- wants to know whether parents check their phone
- repeatedly asks for photos
- encourages them to keep conversations secret
- tries to move them onto a private messaging platform
- pressures them to meet in person
- makes them feel uncomfortable, confused or obligated to reply.
Children should know they can stop responding, block or restrict an account and tell a trusted adult without worrying that they will immediately lose access to their device.
Privacy settings, parental guidance and age-appropriate platforms remain worthwhile too. Researcher Professor Russell Brewer stresses that the study does not show these safety measures are ineffective, but suggests they may not prevent every unwanted approach.
The researchers say online safety education may need to go beyond warning children about obvious sexual requests.
As Dr Logos explains, helping children recognise the earlier warning signs may give them a better chance to step away from a concerning interaction before it escalates.
