22 Oct Why feeling like they belong at school matters for children
Feeling accepted, safe and valued at school isn’t just good for a child’s wellbeing. New research suggests it can also affect how well they learn, cope with stress and take part in school life.
For parents, school success can easily become associated with marks, homework, behaviour and attendance. But another factor may be just as important: whether a child genuinely feels that they belong.
A major international review led by Monash University has examined research into school belonging — the sense that students are valued, recognised and accepted members of their school community.
The review, The Science of Belonging, brings together research from psychology and education and argues that belonging should be considered an important part of both student wellbeing and learning.
What does school belonging look like?
Belonging is more than having friends at school.
It includes feeling safe in the classroom, knowing that teachers and other adults care about you, feeling respected by other students and having opportunities to participate and contribute.
Professor Kelly-Ann Allen from Monash University’s Faculty of Education says belonging is built through everyday experiences rather than one-off wellbeing programs.
These can include supportive relationships with teachers, respectful peer groups, fair responses when things go wrong and genuine opportunities for students to have a voice in school life.
“When students feel valued and recognised as members of their school community, like they belong, their capacity to learn and to manage stress improves,” Professor Allen says.
Why belonging can affect learning
A child who feels anxious, excluded or constantly on guard at school may find it harder to concentrate, participate or take learning risks.
The review suggests the relationship also works both ways. Feeling connected to school can support wellbeing, while a child’s wellbeing can influence how easily they are able to connect with others and feel part of the school community.
This means schools cannot simply tell children they belong. They also need to address things that make belonging difficult, such as bullying, exclusion, fear or ongoing stress.
Some schools deliberately create smaller communities within the school so students are more likely to be known by teachers and peers. Woodleigh School in Victoria, for example, uses small “Homestead” groups across several secondary year levels to encourage connection between students.
The particular approach may vary from school to school, but the broader aim is the same: children should have people who know them, opportunities to contribute and confidence that they will be treated fairly.
Signs your child may not feel connected at school
Children do not always say, “I don’t feel like I belong.”
Parents may instead notice a child becoming reluctant to attend school, withdrawing from activities they once enjoyed, regularly saying they have no one to spend time with, or feeling that teachers or classmates don’t notice or understand them.
One difficult day or friendship problem doesn’t necessarily signal a bigger issue. But a continuing change in how a child talks about school is worth paying attention to.
Simple questions can sometimes reveal more than asking, “How was school?”
Try asking:
- Who did you spend time with today?
- Was there a part of the day you really enjoyed?
- Is there an adult at school you would talk to if something was worrying you?
- Do you feel comfortable asking questions in class?
- Is there anything at school that makes you feel left out?
What can parents do?
If your child seems disconnected, start by listening rather than immediately trying to solve the problem.
Depending on their age, it may then help to talk with their classroom teacher, year adviser or wellbeing staff. Ask not only about academic performance, but about friendships, participation and how your child appears to interact with others during the school day.
For children starting at a new school, moving into secondary school or returning after a difficult period, belonging may take time. Clubs, sport, music, lunchtime activities and other smaller groups can provide another way to find people with similar interests.
Parents can also help children understand that friendships change and that feeling connected at school doesn’t mean being popular or having a large group of friends. Sometimes one trusted friend and one reliable adult at school can make an enormous difference.
Belonging needs to be part of everyday school life
The Monash-led review recommends that schools treat belonging as an important education goal rather than an optional wellbeing extra.
It calls for everyday opportunities for students to develop relationships and participate in school life, greater attention to equity, better ways of measuring belonging and regular feedback from students and their communities.
For parents, the message is a useful reminder: when asking how a child is going at school, academic results are only part of the picture.
Sometimes another question matters just as much: Do they feel that this is a place where they belong?
